How I wish all was just a nightmare for me. Just plain dream from my sleep. I can't believe myself it happened. It wasn't me. I wasn't thinking straight. I wasn't myself. I can't believe it's me in the act of stupidity. I did it for the right reasons but in the wrong way.
I admitted my mistakes. I faced it instead of hiding or keeping my mouth shut. But I still cannot believe I did those mistake which almost seems to costly. I never done it before or even thought of it until 2 nights ago. I'm not a criminal. I dream to eliminate criminals as my career. But instead I acted criminal.
What the heck was I thinking? How do I even have the cheek and courage to perform those actions? What is happening to me? Am I unwell? Am I crazy? Where did the thoughts came from? What got into me?
Everything may be over. All may have been solved. I have regretted my actions deeply. But I have not recover from my guilt. I hurt myself deeply by my own despicable actions. I still CANNOT believe it was actually me! Myself! Alone! All by myself!!!
I'm traumatised! I'm going into depression I think. I'm paranoid. All this happens myself! Muhammad Iskandar Shah i'm so not proud of you. I'm hating you. What have you done? Why do anyone deserve the shit from you?
I have to put up a fake smile and laugh while forgetting the incident. I fell again this time. I want to stand back up and make myself proud again. I will never ever do those shits again. I will never even dare to think about it again.
You know the consequences yourself. Don't crush your own dreams into dust.
To myself,
Muhammad Iskandar Shah
You Sucks SO MUCH This Time!!!!
I admitted my mistakes. I faced it instead of hiding or keeping my mouth shut. But I still cannot believe I did those mistake which almost seems to costly. I never done it before or even thought of it until 2 nights ago. I'm not a criminal. I dream to eliminate criminals as my career. But instead I acted criminal.
What the heck was I thinking? How do I even have the cheek and courage to perform those actions? What is happening to me? Am I unwell? Am I crazy? Where did the thoughts came from? What got into me?
Everything may be over. All may have been solved. I have regretted my actions deeply. But I have not recover from my guilt. I hurt myself deeply by my own despicable actions. I still CANNOT believe it was actually me! Myself! Alone! All by myself!!!
I'm traumatised! I'm going into depression I think. I'm paranoid. All this happens myself! Muhammad Iskandar Shah i'm so not proud of you. I'm hating you. What have you done? Why do anyone deserve the shit from you?
I have to put up a fake smile and laugh while forgetting the incident. I fell again this time. I want to stand back up and make myself proud again. I will never ever do those shits again. I will never even dare to think about it again.
You know the consequences yourself. Don't crush your own dreams into dust.
To myself,
Muhammad Iskandar Shah
You Sucks SO MUCH This Time!!!!
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