Bitter Experience

I experienced a nasty incident and whats like to have a true 'hater', when someone has taken offense by whatever i've said or did which made them wanting to create a huge controversy publicly such as writing a blog post of their own and commenting on a blog to someone related to me. Trying their bestest to destroy everything and accusing me of something which weren't true (at all!).

Yea, I was emotional I must admit when I came to know of the attack which were published in their own blogs to everyone to read. Negative words which hurts the most and everyone knows that. Unfortunately, I didn't handled it the right way. As many other problems came to me at the wrong time I must say made me stressed up and couldn't think properly searching for the wisest solutions to settle the matter.

What hurts the most at the point of time I read comments from different people giving the most negative or nastiest of comments that you can ever read. Hard for me to swallow as I search endlessly for the weapon to fight those "evil" bloggers. But whenever I attempted to defend myself which turns out to be a big mistake as they could take any word I said and re-purpose it as more proof of whatever argument they were making.

Friends who knew about the matter defended me on their blog and the controversies kept growing and growing. Soon after I came to know that my friends were getting their fingers to their keyboards launching the attacks I stopped them. Frustrated I felt as the conroversies kept growing. Loads of bloggers attacked those innocent people around me.

All those controversies resulted in a big spike of traffics. People from anywhere were joining in the "forum" or "fun". Well its human nature that everyone loves to watch a fight or an argument. It was really a challenge for me as lots are getting involved.

Ive learned:

1. When you have a hater they are wearing special lenses that see you in a certain way. No matter what you say back to them, they don’t take on board your words, instead they use them as fuel to keep the flame war going. They love that they have your attention and want to do whatever they can to keep you involved and show you how wrong they feel you are.
2. The medium of text as a communication tool is weak. Words can be interpreted in so many ways and when you try and use them to defend yourself online, you can waste a lot of time.

From what i've learned so far on to make most of the public flaming....

There are actually two options in dealing with haters:

Option 1: If you feel the one attacking you is just saying all kinds of negative remarks on you, just ignore it. They were trying to gain your attention, whatever your response gonna be you are actually giving them what they want! You should just forget about it.

Option 2: Reply and defend yourself!!!!!

I'm sure majority of you will say option 2's the best option. There are no both right and wrong answer but how you use it. For me option 1 is easy. Option two is rife with dangers, but only if you let your emotions get involved.

"The key when replying is to state your position and do so in a mature manner and avoid any personal attacks. What happens in most situations is you get a lot of personal attacks thrown at you, and when you don’t reply with the same, you end up looking a lot better for it." -Yaro Starak

I think i'm gonna stop here for now gonna do something's at home so yea i'll continue maybe later ya!